Marriage wisdom from someone who's been there. A guide for the nervous groom.
Lil' Dick Wood Edition Vol. 1
Rule #1: The Short Man Advantage
Being shorter is actually a marriage superpower. You're always at perfect hugging height.
When you say something dumb, you're right there to apologize quickly. That's efficient.
Rule #2: The Worry Wart Rule
You're a Worrier
You always have been. That's okay.
Worrying Means Caring
Don't let worry run your marriage.
She Married You
Not your high blood pressure or late night gaming habits.
Rule #3: The Power of "Yes, Dear"
You can be right or you can be happy, but you can't be both.
Argument Starts
She's reading your soul.
Just Nod
Say "yes, dear" calmly.
Peace Restored
Marriage white flag works.
Rules #4 & #5: Toilet Seats & Forgetfulness
The Toilet Seat Rule
It's never about the toilet seat. It's about caring for her comfort.
When she asks, say: "I'm so sorry, honey. Thank you for noticing my consistency."
The Forgetful Husband Rule
You'll forget something important. Her birthday, your anniversary, Valentine's Day.
Don't panic. Just say: "I was planning a surprise."
Rule #6: The "Don't Go to Bed Angry" Myth
People Say Never Sleep Angry
Those people have never been married.
Sometimes Sleep On It
Go to bed. Wake up less mad.
Make Pancakes
That's real marriage wisdom.
Rules #7 & #8: Bow Ties & Arrows
The Bow Tie Rule
Tying a bow tie is like understanding her emotions. You think you've got it figured out.
Then suddenly it's twisted and choking you. Let her fix it before you leave.
The Quiver of Arrows Rule
Every time you mess up, she builds her quiver of arrows. Each represents a past mistake.
During disagreements, she'll pull one out. You'll never disarm the quiver. Admire her aim.
Rule #9: The Disney Rule
Right Now
You love Disney. The parks, the magic, matching shirts.
Someday
You'll be holding six bags, a churro, and a cranky toddler.
The Realization
This isn't the happiest place on earth anymore.
The Real Magic
Even when you've outgrown Disney, she'll still be your princess.
Rule #10: The Brotherhood Rule
Never Forget Your Boys
The friends who know your secrets, worries, and bad dance moves.
They Keep You Grounded
They make you laugh when life gets serious. They remind you that you're still you.
You'll Need Them
You'll need your wife and family. But you'll absolutely need your boys too.
The Real Truth About Marriage
No Perfect Rules
Marriage isn't about following instructions. It's about figuring it out together.
One Day at a Time
One argument, one laugh at a time. Hard days and amazing days.
You Found Each Other
Against all odds, you found a great woman. She found a guy who's kind and loyal.
May your love outlast every rule. Congratulations, buddy.
P.S. When you're out with your wife, open the damn car door.
Big Daddy Baba's 10 Rules For Marriage Happiness